Smiling assassin on the John

One of my favourite MP expenses claims revealed last week was former Home Sec John Reid's £30 claim for a black, glittery toilet seat.

This must be among the most inexplicable of all claims. The man known for having the smile - and style - of an assassin, who at the Home Office positioned himself somewhere to the right of Genghis Khan, who proudly wears the scars of Glasgow Labour politics, submitting a receipt for an item that would not have been out of place on Elton John's wedding list.